Here are the major revelations revealed in the former Nickelodeon star's recently released, tell-all memoir. Jennette McCurdy 's not holding back. In her recently released memoir, I'm Glad My Mom Died , the former Nickelodeon actress opens up about the harrowing trauma she faced throughout her childhood in part due to the stifling control of her late mother, Debra. But that's not the only facade she hid behind. She also notes that the persona she was known for throughout her youth and young adult life was a front forced upon her by her mom, who wanted nothing more than stardom for Jennette. In particular, "My mom's emotions were so erratic that it was like walking a tightrope every day. The mood fluctuations were daily.
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This overwhelming pressure of keeping up this front led the actress to suffer from eating disorders , addiction, and more. Her mother was undergoing challenges of her own at the same time; when Jennette was 2 years old, Debra was diagnosed with breast cancer. She died in After enduring two decades worth of emotional and physical abuse at the hands of her mother , the year-old actress is now ready to publicly reflect on her past. Jennette said she was forced into the life Debra wished she could've had; Jennette recalls her mom asking, "You want to be Mommy's little actress? Unlike Jennette's brother, Marcus, who impressed Barbara with his monologue, Jennette was told she "lacks charisma. Debra, disappointed, managed to convince Barbara to accept Jennette — but only after agreeing to enroll her in a grueling acting school. Forcing her into acting was just one of the many controlling situations the actress says her mother put her through. The extremity of Debra's control went as far as "wiping my butt" at eight years old, Jennette recalls in the memoir, adding that her mom said she "needs to do it until I'm at least In addition, Jennette says Debra regularly performed breast and "front butt" exams on her to check for potentially cancerous lumps and bumps.She also noted that her mother gave her showers, too, in addition to — and at the same time as — her brother Scottie, who was almost When he asked to shower himself, Jennette writes: "Mom sobbed and said she didn't want him to grow up so he never asked again after that. Jennette points to her mom as the root of her eating disorder and believes Debra faced one herself. And as Jennette recalls, for Debra, "The only thing worse than a cancer diagnosis is a growing-up diagnosis," so she tried to appease her by looking younger. Doing everything to make her mom happy, she turned to calorie restriction per Debra's suggestion. After a few weeks of our routine, she provides me with a stack of diet books that I finish quickly," Jennette writes in her memoir, adding that she began to feel rewarded for going to extremes.
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Prior to booking her breakout role on Nickelodeon's iCarly , Jennette recalls the anxiety-filled moment she told her mom she wanted to quit acting , immediately regretting what she had just admitted. Jennette recalls her mom's reaction in her memoir: "'Don't be silly, you love acting. It's your favorite thing in the world,' Mom says in a way that makes it sound like a threat. This was our chance! This was ouuuuur chaaaaance! Mascara trickles down her cheeks. She's hysterical, like I was in the Hollywood Homicide audition. Her hysteria frightens me and demands to be taken care of.
Jennette details numerous instances where she felt " exploited " as a teen actor both on and off set. The actress refers to the person behind the demands as "The Creator" throughout the memoir, never naming them. She recalls a time while filming an episode of iCarly when "The Creator" — whom she describes in the memoir as mean-spirited, controlling, and terrifying — insisted she wear a bikini, instead of her preferred one-piece swimsuit. She feared being viewed as a "sexual being," she says. Another time, she says, "The Creator" peer pressured her into drinking alcohol when she was underage while comparing the iCarly cast to " Victorious kids" who get "drunk all the time. She also says she was forced by "The Creator" to have her first kiss on camera during a scene with Nathan Kress for an episode of iCarly. Jennette reveals she has kept a solid friendship with iCarly costar Cosgrove, even long after the series wrapped in In the book, Jennette praises Cosgrove for being a kind friend during the most difficult years of her life. In the spinoff, which only lasted one season after its premiere, Jennette says her dynamic with the singer was fraught with jealousy and resentment. As a pop star on the rise, Jennette recalls how Grande was always absent from set, which angered her; she claims she was always left to "hold down the fort.
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And I'm pissed at her. Jealous of her. She said she did not wish to be bribed to keep quiet about unethical behavior, especially in regard to a network riddled with shows for children. Shortly after the show wrapped, reports circulated that it ended because Jennette was "upset" her costar was getting paid more, she writes. According to Jennette, she was told "it was canceled because of a sexual harassment claim against one of our producers. When her mother was on her death bed with a predicted 48 hours to live, Jennette whispered in her ear news she thought would revive her. I'm finally down to 89 pounds," she recalls in her memoir. Following her mother's passing, Jennette says she relapsed, battling anorexia, bulimia, and binge-eating yet again. I look like a kid again. I'm determined to keep this up.I'm honoring Mom," she writes. After trying out a number of therapists, she ultimately turned to one who helped her on her road to recovery. She also praised Cosgrove for her constant support throughout her journey. Though noting the road to recovery is a "difficult" one, she optimistically notes, "It's the kind of difficult I have pride in. All calls are toll-free and confidential. When you visit the site, Dotdash Meredith and its partners may store or retrieve information on your browser, mostly in the form of cookies.
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