I Won't Hate Homosexuals No Matter How Much The Media Wants Me To

by L.N. Smithee

Before I begin, allow me to introduce myself.

I am a thirtysomething straight man.

I believe the Bible is the Word of God.

I am a Christian.

I believe that the Bible says that homosexual behavior -- among many, many other things -- is a sin.

(I will, when discussing the topic face-to-face, defend that stance, as if it necessary.  I am a veteran of many attempts to do so online, but I have discovered that it is pointless when you are cyber-debating someone determined to ignore what is obvious.  So don't go there.  Just accept it.)

I believe that the Bible says that those who unrepentantly practice sin -- any sin -- will not be welcomed into His Kingdom.

I believe that is the teaching of the early Christians.  I believe that the changes in society do not change God's view of sin.

I believe that the lives of homosexuals are precious in the eyes of God.

I believe that homosexuality is a practice, and not an "orientation."

I don't believe that homosexuality can be changed.  I KNOW it can.  Not from personal experience, but the experiences of people that I know and love.

I have had (or do have) teachers, neighbors, classmates, workmates, and business partners that were and/or are homosexuals.  I have treated them with kindness, patience, and the same friendliness that I have treated all other people.  I have gotten along with them without embracing their political or social views.

And yes, I have preached to them.  This is never easy and sometimes hazardous in San Francisco, where I have lived all my life.

I don't believe that God wants people to kill or beat up homosexuals.  I have never beaten anyone up because they were homosexual. Since I was in junior high school, I have never referred to homosexuals in abusive terms.  I have never yelled slurs or insults at homosexuals.  I do not joke about killing or maiming them.  I don't make AIDS jokes.

You may be asking why I am telling you this.  It is because every time you have anything to say about homosexuals that they or their supporters don't want you to, you are automatically called "hateful."

It doesn't matter a whit what your reasons for not agreeing with the majority of gay activists about -- as long as you don't toe the line, they say they know exactly what you are, and will speak of you in the most mean-spirited terms.  But that is not the worst part.

The worst part is the feeling of your explanations of why you are NOT hateful hitting the ground after slamming into a brick wall known as the mainstream media.

Whether the reason is because there are homosexuals in charge, whether liberals with similar beliefs and tenets are at the helm, or just because the capitalists in the penthouses know their market and cater to it, you cannot get a fair chance to state your belief if you don't join the chorus that says "gayness" is normal.  In their minds, that opinion is evidence you want to see homosexuals bleed in the street, desperately gasp for breath in an AIDS ward, or burn in hell.

An illustration of this kind of thought in action (in this case, by the San Francisco Examiner) is the subject of my first essay for my new website.

What you are about to read is the controversial full-page advertisement that was run in the San Francisco Examiner on Sunday, August 16, 1998.  It was paid for by Exodus Ministries, a group that counsels those who believe what the Bible says about homosexuality and seek to change their behavior.

There was controversy about the ad being placed in the Examiner, and it was actually refused by the morning Chronicle, to the applause of the gay community of Northern California.  The Examiner ran the ad, but only after it was very clear to all those upset that the Ex would slam the ad in an editorial to "counterbalance" it.  (This still did not sit well with some gay figures, who pressured the Examiner to donate the proceeds from the ad to gay groups.  The Examiner refused.)

I have formatted the ad as closely as I could to the original, and have altered none of the text. The original ad had a panoramic photograph of a large crowd of "ex-gays" between the headline and the text of the ad, but I could not reproduce it clearly enough for this web page.

Read the text carefully, and then hit the link to the Examiner editorial in response to the ad.

(Disclaimer:  I do not belong to Exodus Ministries, and have never met or talked with any of its members.  The following reproduction of the ad is for the purpose of illustrating my point regarding media mistreatment of those who don't believe "gay is OK."   The opinions and statistics are those of Exodus, and no endorsement of their practice or programs, whatever they are, should be assumed.)

We're standing for the truth  that homosexuals can change.

Thousands of former homosexuals can celebrate a new life because someone cared enough to share with them the truth of God's healing love.  Thank you Trent Lott, Reggie White, and recording artists Angie and Debbie Winans for having the courage to speak the truth about sexual sin.

If you love someone, you'll tell them the truth.

You might be shocked to know that most Christians who speak against homosexual behavior are motivated more by love than by hate.  Of course, "hate'' gets all the headlines, but the truth still remains...We believe every human being is precious to God and is entitled to respect.  But when we see great suffering among homosexuals, it's an inherent Christian calling to show compassion and concern.  The truth we know is that God abhors any form of sexual sin, be it premarital sex, adultery, prostitution or homosexuality.   And if you were trapped in some self-destructive behavior, wouldn't you want someone to care?

Calling homosexual behavior is not anti-gay, it's pro-life.

We've seen the statistics...and they don't lie.  Homosexual behavior is not healthy behavior when it accounts for a disproportionate number of sexually transmitted diseases (STD's) such as gonorrhea and Hepatitis A and B; when of all reported AIDS cases among males since 1981 have been men engaged in homosexual behavior; and when homosexual youth are twenty-three times more likely to contract STD's than heterosexuals.  The cultural answer?  More condoms!  Yet it has been proved that condoms don't protect against all contact STD's.  In fact, they often fail...and they're also not designed to protect against the emotional damage done to your heart.

Homosexuality is not a sex issue...it's a heart issue.

There are problems foe homosexuals that even condoms can't fix.  Studies also show a high degree of destructive behavior among homosexuals, including alcohol, drug abuse, and emotional and physical violence.  And it occurs even in homosexual affirming cities like San Francisco.  So, it's not a lack of acceptance...it's behavior -- the visible response to a broken heart.

The truth may hurt before it can heal.  But change is possible.

Thousands of stories from "ex-gays" (like those pictured above) confirm what counselors and pastors see every day.  Homosexuals routinely describe deep-seated almost unconscious desires that drive a same-sex urge.  They also tell of rejection from early childhood and lack of bonding to same-sex parents, sexual violence and rape, or mental and emotional abuse as critical elements in the formation of their gender-identity.  But these life situation s don't deny the choice each makes in yielding to temptation, no matter how strong the urge.  Still many have walked out homosexuality...into sexual celibacy or even marriage.  How?  Often because someone cared enough to love them, despite what they were, and to confront the truth of their sexual sin.  For the Christian, that love comes in the person of Jesus Christ and motivates our commitment to this issue.

We don't need to be perfect to talk about sin.

Quite the contrary.  A sinner can spot a sin a mile away.  Just ask Trent Lott.  Or Reggie White.  They'd be the first to tell you they're far from perfect.  The truth is that we're all sinners.  The critical difference in this debate is that some recognize their sin and repent and others don't.  That begs the larger question...if we can't talk about sin as a nation just where is our moral compass pointed? And is there truth in a created moral order, or is truth anything we define it to be?
 

Taking a stand.  Extending a hand.

For years Christians have taken a stand in the public square against aggressive homosexual activism.  We've paid a heavy price, with sound bite labels like ''bigot'' and ''homophobe.'' But all along we've had a hand extended, something largely unreported in the media...an open hand that offers healing for homosexuals, not harassment. We want reason in this debate, not rhetoric.  And we want to share the hope we have in Christ, for those who feel acceptance of homosexuality is their only hope.

You can make a difference.

We are a broad coalition representing millions of concerned families asking for an honest debate with our opponents.  This is not a Republican issue...it's not a Democrat or Independent issue.  It's a truth issue.  We're asking you to reexamine the truth of homosexuality with ALL the facts in hand, apart from the half-truths and hostile name calling.  Ask us to explain our position on sin.  Then ask the other side. But ask!  Then let the real healing begin.

If you really love someone, you'll tell them the truth.

__________________________________

(A sidebar in the center of the text of the ad said the following:

Senate Majority Leader Trent Lott, when asked whether homosexuality is a sin, said: "Yes it is.  In America right now, there is an element that wants to make that alternative lifestyle acceptable.  You still love that person and you shouldn't try to mistreat them or treat them as outcasts.  You should try to show them a way to deal with that.")

Link to 8/16/98 S.F. Examiner Editorial in response to the Exodus ad.

All right, you have read the Exodus ad, and you have read the Examiner's editorial.
Let's compare them side by side, subject by subject.

For the purpose of comparison, I have highlighted in yellow the areas in which the Exodus ad and the Examiner’s editorial are discussing what are supposed to be common topics. 

As you will see, at times the Examiner made things up out of thin air about the Exodus ad. 

The sentences that illustrate that fact are highlighted in yellow and are in red font.

 

Exodus Advertisement  August 16, 1998	San Francisco Examiner Editorial August 16, 1998
You might be shocked to know that most Christians who speak against homosexual behavior are motivated more by love than by hate.  Of course, "hate" gets all the headlines, but the truth still remains...We believe every human being is precious to God and is entitled to respect.  But when we see great suffering among homosexuals, it’s an inherent Christian calling to show compassion and concern.	As individuals, many of us at the newspaper find the views expressed in this ad abhorrent. The Examiner's editorial position is that the ad - sponsored by a coalition of Christian groups - represents a perversion of Christian ideals.
The truth we know is that God abhors any form of sexual sin, be it premarital sex, adultery, prostitution or homosexuality.   And if you were trapped in some self-destructive behavior, wouldn’t you want someone to care?	Where, for example, is the notion of Christian charity in the ad's brutish recitation of the "sins" of gay people? Where is the principle of Christian brotherhood in the ad's maligning of the feelings and values of gay people?
We’ve seen the statistics...and they don’t lie.  Homosexual behavior is not healthy behavior when it accounts for a disproportionate number of sexually transmitted diseases (STD’s) such as gonorrhea and Hepatitis A and B; when of all reported AIDS cases among males since 1981 have been men engaged in homosexual behavior; and when homosexual youth are twenty-three times more likely to contract STD’s than heterosexuals.  The cultural answer?  More condoms!  Yet it has been proved that condoms don’t protect against all contact STD’s.  In fact, they often fail...and they’re also not designed to protect against the emotional damage done to your heart.	The ad suggests the most barbaric of stereotypes about gays. That God is wreaking punishment on them, through gonorrhea, hepatitis and other sexually transmitted diseases, for their moral choices.
Thousands of stories from "ex-gays" (like those pictured above) confirm what counselors and pastors see every day.  Homosexuals routinely describe deep-seated almost unconscious desires that drive a same-sex urge.  They also tell of rejection from early childhood and lack of bonding to same-sex parents, sexual violence and rape, or mental and emotional abuse as critical elements in the formation of their gender-identity.	...That gays are made gay by "rejection from early childhood and lack of bonding to same-sex parents, sexual violence and rape, or mental and emotional abuse."
[M]any have walked out of homosexuality...into sexual celibacy or even marriage.  How?  Often because someone cared enough to love them, despite what they were, and to confront the truth of their sexual sin.  For the Christian, that love comes in the person of Jesus Christ and motivates our commitment to this issue.	...being gay is a "sexual sin" which can easily be wiped away by inducing gays to find and accept their latent heterosexuality.
A sinner can spot a sin a mile away.  Just ask Trent Lott.  Or Reggie White.  They’d be the first to tell you they’re far from perfect.  The truth is that we’re all sinners.  The critical difference in this debate is that some recognize their sin and repent and others don’t.  That begs the larger question...if we can’t talk about sin as a nation just where is our moral compass pointed? And is there truth in a created moral order, or is truth anything we define it to be?	Look at Reggie White, the towering defensive   lineman for the Green Bay Packers, who is featured in another of the religious coalition's anti-gay ads. His potential career as a TV commentator was ruined by his public utterances against gays, and his team reprimanded him for wearing his uniform while proselytizing.    The ad in today's Examiner shows a smiling flock of 850 "former homosexuals" who gathered at a Seattle meeting of Exodus, identified as a nationwide ex-gay ministry. Two of them, John and Anne Paulk, now a married couple, also appear on the cover of this week's Newsweek magazine...    The other 848 individuals surely have their own stories to tell. No doubt each one is different. That individuality reminds us of another Christian teaching: That each individual contains a divine spirit within. No one, certainly no Christian, would want to violate that by lumping individuals together in a class of "sinners."
We are a broad coalition representing millions of concerned families asking for an honest debate with our opponents.  This is not a Republican issue...it’s not a Democrat or Independent issue.  It’s a truth issue. We’re asking you to reexamine the truth of homosexuality with ALL the facts in hand, apart from the half-truths and hostile name calling.  Ask us to explain our position on sin.  Then ask the other side. But ask!  Then let the real healing begin. If you really love someone, you’ll tell them the truth.	As much as the views expressed in today's ad disturb us, it would bother us more to see them suppressed. Giving exposure to quackery doesn't mean anyone buys it.  Readers with open minds will weigh what is said, measure it against other evidence and make up their own minds.   We invite you to join the debate.

You have just read the last line of the Examiner editorial.
Please keep in mind the second-to-last line (highlighted in blue).

I have saved the most egregious untruth from the Examiner editorial, out of order, for last:

"The saving grace is that, in San Francisco, such Neanderthalisms will evoke a collective hoot. But there are perceived dangers, too: That ads such as this will encourage ostracism of and violence against gays."

This is the so-called conventional wisdom.  Everybody who is anybody says it: Matthew Shepard's blood is on the hands of the likes of warm and fuzzy Christian right family figures like nominal Republican Presidential hopeful Gary Bauer and Focus on the Family’s Dr. James Dobson, suggested NBC superstar Katie Couric.  Republican Senators Trent Lott and Dick Armey share the shame and blame too, suggested syndicated columnist Deborah Mathis.

I can almost hear some of the questions that you may be asking revolve in your minds now.  I will try to address them.

Someone like Katie Couric and the editors of the Examiner wouldn't say something like that if it weren’t backed up by research, would they?

Not only would they say it without research, they did say it despite research to the contrary.

But the editors of the Examiner didn't know about that research, did they?

They should have.  It was in their paper.

Oh yeah?  When?

August 16, 1998.

Wait, L.N., isn't that the same day as the Exodus ad and the above editorial?

You got it.  Here it is.

Now, the story's heart is in the right.... I mean, left place.  It is about the mindset of people who commit "hate crimes", and was presented at the convention of (get this) the American Psychological Association, which was meeting in San Francisco at the time.

The way that the story was written, you really have to read carefully to see where the old reliable cause-and-effect argument is found wanting – but if you do read it, you will see it.  

From the article:

No data exist either, [psychologist and gay studies professor Gregory M. Herek] said,
to back up the theory that anti-gay violence rises when
cultural rhetoric against homosexuality heats up, as during the
 current ad campaign by conservative Christian
groups calling gays sinners and
urging them to find God and go straight.

But psychological research has shown that "there is
a tendency to attach more of a stigma to a person
who is perceived as having an undesirable condition
if they are also perceived as having some control
over that condition," Herek said - whether that's
being fat, a smoker or being gay.

Public opinion has swung to the view that being gay
is inborn and therefore not a choice, he said, though
scientists don't know for sure and believe causes
include both nature and nurture.

"I see these ads as an attempt to counter this trend
and promote the view that people do have a
choice," Herek said. That would tend to lead to
greater stigmatization of gays, he added.

Personal to Dr. Herek:  Nice save for your team.  You had to find a way to keep the Christian right demonized, and you did the best with what you had.  

Strangely enough, what seemed to be more important to Herek was the possible countering of the trend toward the idea that homosexuals don’t have a choice – even though he couldn’t state unequivocally that there is scientific evidence that proves that people who think it is a choice are wrong.  Nonetheless, if someone does say that it isn’t natural, or is sinful, or is a choice, they are persecuted as if there actually was some sort of empirical data that they are off-base.

Of course, since this study was published, the "gay gene" theory (biological in nature, not psychological) has been debunked, but the media majority will do its best to make sure that public perception stays the same regardless.

But let's return to the Examiner editorial:

Readers with open minds will weigh what is said,

measure it against other evidence

 and make up their own minds.

Let's be fair.  They said "readers."  They didn't say "editors."

That doesn't change the truth of what the Examiner says.  Open minded readers will make up their own minds.   They will see that people who disagree, like myself, are not necessarily hateful, and may even be loving.

And that seems to be what they are afraid of.
________
Written by L.N. Smithee June 27, 1999.